27 July 2009

Let the crisis begin

It is with great sadness that I tell you I finally broke down and did it. I bought a pair of cheaters -- reading glasses.

I can't tell you how much this pains me as I have always prided myself on my extraordinary vision. Although I might have hearing problems, at least my eyes were stellar!

Well, welcome to the beginnings of my mid-life crisis. It's not so much a crisis as it is a annoyance. How am I supposed to keep these things handy anyway? I don't carry a purse and I'm certainly not going to wear a chain around my neck and call them a fashion accessory. It's all very awkward right now.

I couldn't get the DVD player to work this morning. So, I called hubby and he wasn't able to help (it's really interesting how I'm the one home and typically the one to fix things (not to mention homeschool and run the household), but when I'm stumped, I call my husband. The problem this has created is now when anything is wrong, the kids automatically say "Don't worry, dad can fix it," making me feel like a meager stand-in). I had to give in and go get my glasses to read what the buttons on the front of the machine even said. After all that angst, and a good dose of DVD inflicted humility, the durn thing still isn't working.

All I hear in my head the past few day is, "Man you are dust and to dust you shall return."

Here's looking forward to that glorified body.


Ray from MN said...


Got your AARP card yet? Welcome to the advanced years. We're on the far side of the bell curve now. You're going to have to learn a lot of new tricks to cope. I'll give you a tip for one.

I have been using the cheaters for probably 10 or 15 years, but I still don't need spectacles (you never see that word any more, do you) for driving or normal activities. I can still pass my drivers license exam (got one coming up, though).

Consequently, I generally have glasses with me, never knowing when I am going to be required to read some fine print, but as often as not, I end up leaving them on a table, counter or desk, ne'er to be found again.

Consequently, I go through a half dozen or more pairs a year and keep spares in the car, in the bedroom, near my computer, in an office I occasionally work at, etc.

This can get kinda pricey if one purchases cheaters at "Glasses-R-Us."

Get out your Yellow Pages and a map and pinpoint your nearest Dollar Stores. Many of them still have them for sale for a buck. Some for five bucks, but Walgreens is a lot more expensive. Purchase a handful when you find that place; you'll need them soon, because I forgot to mention the cheap frames break easily.

Speaking of broke, being generally broke myself and a frugal sort, I once investigated purchasing reading glasses "in bulk." You could save a bit of money. 300 pairs for 59 cents each. But you had to get them as part of a sales kit, getting something like 25 each in various designs and strengths (100, 125, 150. . . 250, 300, etc.

How they can manufacture them and make a profit at 59 cents is beyond me?

I don't know if it is true, but I read once that your eyes slowly get worse as you age and you will have to get more powerful strengths as time goes by. But the article said, don't get 250x to start with because your eyes will weaken faster. I don't know if that is true, but I've adhered to that. But I am up to 250x now, having started at 150x. I think 350x is the strongest available at the Dollar Store. After that, Glasses-R-Us for 25 bucks or more.

David Zampino said...

Moses was a hundred and twenty years old when he died; his eye was not dim, nor his natural force abated.

Do you suspect, perhaps, he had a special charism not granted to most of us? :-)

swissmiss said...

The FAR side of the bell curve...yikes, not yet!! At least men typically have a shirt pocket they can put their glasses in.

I did buy a pair at Walmart over the weekend, but plan to take them back because I got four pair at Sam's club for the price of one at Walmart. I got the 125X, after debating between them and the 100X. Once I take them off, my eyes seem worse, kind of like what you said about not getting the 250X right away.

I'm still a good decade away from an AARP card. Doesn't mean things won't start falling apart before then though!

Moses is one of my favorite. I wouldn't trade places with him though, he had his own issues. Makes wearing glasses not so bad, relatively! Maybe it wasn't so much a charism but a result of "seeing" God :)

Cathy_of_Alex said...

I can vouch for having to take Ray to get some new cheater after he misplaced, all out lost, or sat on them. LOL!

I can't wait for my glorified body either-if I make it that far.

Ray from MN said...


Lies! She Lies! Lies like a rug! It was defective manufacturing.

But how else can I read a menu?